“Christian, child abuse survivor, in active recovery from a 20 year detour into the hell of anorexia, bulimia and self harm. Now a married mother of four. Learning to embrace serenity.”
That was my self summary for years. Am I still that woman? There is less of me now. And somehow, more.
I am a Christian. My childhood is as it was. As far as life with Ed goes, I take the challenges of ongoing recovery as they come. And they do. I miss my eating disorder sometimes, but I’ve gotten too used to (relative) health to let myself fall once again through that distorted looking-glass.
I am still married. Next to God, Jeff is my greatest constant in life. We may be “all growed up” ( in theory anyway), but he is still every bit the boy I met when I was fourteen.
There is less of me than there was. There is more. I have five children now. I could write volumes about each of them and all the libraries in the entire world would collapse under the weight of my words. I could. But this blog? This is the story of my baby. Of healing and grace and beauty for ashes.
This is the story of Joshua.