“Christian, child abuse survivor, in active recovery from a 20 year detour into the hell of anorexia, bulimia and self harm. Now a married mother of four. Learning to embrace serenity.”
That was my self summary for years. Am I still that woman? There is less of me now. And somehow, more.
I am a Christian. My childhood is as it was. As far as life with Ed goes, I take the challenges of ongoing recovery as they come. And they do. I miss my eating disorder sometimes, but I’ve gotten too used to (relative) health to let myself fall once again through that distorted looking-glass.
I am still married. Next to God, Jeff is my greatest constant in life. We may be “all growed up” ( in theory anyway), but he is still every bit the boy I met when I was fourteen.
There is less of me than there was. There is more. I have five children now. I could write volumes about each of them and all the libraries in the entire world would collapse under the weight of my words. I could. But this blog? This is the story of my baby. Of healing and grace and beauty for ashes.
This is the story of Joshua.
~Jennifer
fortheloveofjosh 
Prayers for you and your family, Jennifer. Thank you for posting. You are brave and lovely. I see the grace and love of the Father in your words. Many blessings to you. I look forward to your next post.
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Thank you so much, Laura. Truly. That was beautiful. I have half a dozen partially written posts that I really want to piece together but a certain cranky, teething six month old simply can’t be reasoned with! ~smile
God bless you.
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You are very brave writing this Jen.But I think t is also therapy or you.God is using you to reach out to others in the same situation.I pray He will guide you.
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Oh, it is. Very much like a diary only a little more polished. (Ideally). When I first met with other women who had children from rape, my world changed. I was part of a club that no one asked to join but couldn’t imagine not belonging to. Sometimes just knowing that you’re not alone and that things will be okay can make all the difference. That’s my mission. Purging solely for the sake of my own mental health I can do behind closed doors. I appreciate your comment and truly covet those prayers.
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With your husband as a steadfast rock supporting you and Christ at the head leading you both!
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Amen, my friend.
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Sharing stories like this are hard to share, but oh the lives it touches.
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That’s the prayer. That by sharing people might see you. Might see my son. Lives and souls, precious to God.
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